It is maybe a little odd to share this with the whole Internet, but I delivered it to 120+ people last weekend. I am really proud of it, and I really love my sister a lot, so I am happy to put it out there. I also could not read enough examples of maid of honor speeches when I was writing mine, so maybe it will be helpful? This is, in obnoxious speechwriting terms, remarks as prepared for delivery. I adlibbed in a couple of places, I'm sure.
Thank you so much for being here tonight. Thank you especially to everyone who traveled to celebrate with us today. And thank you to Erin and Corey for throwing an incredible party. If you check our texts, emails, Slacks, Google Drive, Facebook messages, phone calls — you'll know that I am intimately aware of all the details of the Bobeck wedding. They have done a phenomenal job preparing for today, and it truly lives up to the phrase "best day ever."
For those of you who don't know me, my name is Morgan. I am the maid of honor and Erin's younger sister. For those of you who do know me, you're welcome.
My sister and I share a love of many things, among them our passion for travel, which comes from our mom; our love of trivia, which comes from our dad; and our exuberance for Game of Thrones, which we share with our brother, and might kindly be described as “overzealous.”
But more than anything, we sincerely love being with family and being together, whether it is raucous Boxing Day bowling with the extended Hanley clan or quiet time with just the two of us. One of my favorite things is when I am sitting at home on a weekend afternoon and receive a FaceTime call from Erin. I answer, and we chat for a while. She asks me the question she called about or fills me in on her day or the most recent episode of Grey’s Anatomy. Eventually, though, we always fall silent. I start cleaning my room or scrolling through Twitter; Erin is distracted by Ellie or turns her attention to the Real Housewives. But we are together. It is enough to be that small part of each other’s day, simply comforted by the other's presence.
We have had our spats as all sisters do — Erin would want you to know that I did not vote for her for high school swim team captain, and she will now expect me to counter with the time that she missed my college graduation. We also will debate certain topics until we are blue in the face — what is the point of the Kardashians? Which of us is Annie and which of us is Hallie in the Parent Trap? Who is Rory Gilmore’s best boyfriend?
What isn't up for debate is how much we love each other. Erin has celebrated me through my triumphs and held my hand through heartbreaks. She has been the best person to stand by my side for my whole life. And now she has a pretty great guy standing by her side for the rest of her life.
I met Corey on my twentieth birthday — because what is a middle child's retelling of a story if it doesn't include their moment being stolen? My mom, dad, Erin, and I were upstairs at Topo for dinner. When my dad went to the bathroom, Erin got… really weird. A little nervous. And she told us that we were sitting at our coveted patio table because someone had reserved it for us — technically, that was against the rules. Not to be dramatic, but our server had basically risked life and limb to get us this table. Well, he was trying to make a good impression — Erin was going on a date with our server Corey later that week. Erin turned to my mom and said, "Do not tell Dad. But make sure he tips well."
From that very first night, I have had a front seat to their relationship. There are many people here who would vie for the title of "best third wheel" to this couple, but I think as one of the few who knew Erin when she rode a bike with three wheels, I've got a pretty strong case.
If you have been in the same vicinity as Erin and a Netflix account at any point over the past 4 and a half years, there's a good chance she's turned to you and said, "Corey and I are just like Jim and Pam from The Office. Don’t you think?" Or maybe you were near her and a Hulu account, and she said, "Don't you just love Nick and Jess on New Girl? I think Corey and I are like them." Or perhaps you were close to a DVD box set of Friends and Erin pulled out her favorite comparison, "Monica and Chandler are the best couple. Corey and I are totally them.”
But here's the thing, Erin, and I hate to break it you — you are not Jim and Pam. You are not Nick and Jess. You are not Monica and Chandler or Lilly and Marshall or Meredith and Derek.
You’re Erin and Corey.
You adore corny dad jokes. You joyfully welcome friends into your home and even let them snuggle in your comfortable king bed. And you are as generous with your love as you are with buying drinks when we’re out.
You may not be one of the great television romances of all time, but you are one of the great romances of my lifetime.
Corey, you are a wonderful man. You define perseverance and have a work ethic that is unmatched. You went to the finest university in the world and can come up with a smart joke at the drop of a hat.
But, even with all of that, I can tell you one thing with absolute confidence — Erin is the best thing that ever happened to you.
And Erin, you are my very best friend. You are the smartest person I know, and you inspire me every day to strive for more as a professional woman. You delight in irreverent humor, and your easy smile and ready laugh enchant those around you.
But as stellar as you are, dear sister, I can tell you this for sure — Corey is the best thing that ever happened to you.
I cannot wait to watch you grow and learn and love together for the rest of your lives.
If everyone would join me and raise your glass.
A toast to the groom. To the bride. From your sister who’s always by your side. May you have a lifetime of happiness together.